Transitioning

It has been just under two weeks since I wrote last.

To be honest, I have started a number of posts since then. The time to finish a post has been pretty limited recently for a number of reasons. The intensity of Institute increased the closer to the end I got and the number of responsibilities outside of Institute grew as well. I found myself spending my off time finding an apartment, and insurance, and electricity, and internet, and furniture, and supplies for my first year. The time for reflection has been minimal at best.

I need to make writing a priority. I need to decompress from the endless to-do list that will only continue to flood my mind as the school year truly begins. I did buy an agenda today so I'm hopeful that this tool will only make the year easier to navigate and my time easier to manage. I am still lacking a note-taking journal for training, planning, meetings, and all the other things I will need to write down, but I have one in mind.

In the past two weeks I have experienced quite a few things. Some of them have been great and others, not so much. My coach got me to try coffee one day before a lesson. It was intense. Corps members were asking how I had become so energetic. I enjoyed the experience, but when I found myself bouncing in place at 7pm that night, I decided coffee was just not for me. I will stick to my lightly caffeinated teas or drink my coffees decaf from now on.

Adult life is quickly catching up with me and I find myself less than enthused as some of its components. Literally everything I purchase ever needs insurance. Insurance is expensive. Buying things is not fun. Bills are cool. Except not really. Shopping for furniture for an entire apartment is completely overwhelming. Also, everything cost money. Money does not come easy. And do not even get me started on taxes...

Institute is coming to an end very quickly. There is less than 24 hours left and my feelings could not be anymore mixed. On the one hand, this was all very stressful and intense. On the other hand, I am about to dive head first into a full school year where I responsible for the learning of children. I would be lying if I said that I am not still nervous about this journey I am embarking on. Also, add an extra layer of being a Master's degree student to the mix and suddenly I feel like a deer in headlights. I specifically remember telling myself that I would not be getting a Master's Degree for a few years. Well life laughed boldly at my statement and here I am.

The due dates are starting to build up. The intensity is real but I am committed to staying proactive. I want to put off going into survival mode for as long as possible. I want to stay as far ahead for as long as I possibly can. If you have any suggestions, whether you have worked as a teacher or not, please let me know! I want all the help I can get.

I will be returning to Austin this weekend for a brief visit and to pick up the remainder of my belongings that did not make it to Dallas the first time. I would also love any suggestions for furniture procurement. Is it best to finance or buy outright? Any special location you recommend? Any brand? Texture? Color? Item? I have a running list but I know it is incomplete. If there is anything you see that is missing, please let me know so I'm not struggling to survive in my apartment because I forgot something crazy obvious like toilet paper or a washer.

Couch (sleeper, but not futon). TV stand (bedroom and living room). Bed frame. Mattress. Desk. Bookcase. Dresser. Dining table. Dining chairs. Patio table. Patio chairs. Loveseat/chair. Computer chair. Washer. Dyer.

Toilet paper. Paper towels. Plates. Bowls. Cups. Silverware. Cookware. Cooking utensils. Laundry detergent. Dish detergent. Printer. Toaster. Lamp. Fan.

I am also unsure of the things I will need for my classroom. I am a fifth grade science teacher. Any ideas that you have are welcome and appreciated. I will be reviewing my TEKS soon to see what topics I'll be teaching. There are also non-content related items that I am sure are important for any classroom. So please let me know what pops into your mind when you hear the phrase "classroom essentials". I would really love the help!!!

I am going to find a day to just sit down and not do anything. It will feel amazing. I will be proud of myself!

I Miss You

Today, we talked about what we miss.

It is the middle of week five. There are two a half weeks left of summer training. So much is happening. Summer school is officially halfway over. Emotions are running high. Putting words to those feelings are important. That is what we did today. My coach asked us a series of questions and I am taking the time to add more to my response. I want to think more about the things that I miss.


What do you miss? What is causing you pain?

I miss working out. I have spent five days a week in the gym since January. I did skip Spring Break and there were a few other days I missed, but overall it was five days a week. I miss the routine. I miss the pride I felt in this work I put into my body. I miss the confidence that I felt from a changing body. I miss the excitement of stepping onto a scale and feeling joy at the numbers I saw (and disappointment sometimes too). I started the year at around 175lbs. I came to Dallas at 160lbs. When I went home for the Fourth of July, I stepped on the scale a few times and hit around 155lbs. I am terrified to return home at the end of July and step on the scale again.

Who do you miss?

I miss my nephew. Seeing him everyday always brought me incredible amounts of joy. I was able to see him learn and grow. I got to see him laugh and smile everyday. I got to see him bump his head when he bounced too hard or ran too fast. I got to see him get back up and keep running. Going back home for the 4th of July really made me realize how much I am going to miss seeing him everyday. When I left Austin to come to Institute in Dallas, Kyree was able to jump in one spot. Not even one month later, I walk inside and he is running towards me and jumps the last few steps. It was incredible to see how much he had grown and learned, but it also reminded me of all the small moment I would miss living away from home. Living in Fort Worth will certainly have its pros and cons, but this is without a doubt one of the most painful cons.

What is an institution you miss?

I miss my fraternity. I never realized how safe I felt in that space until I was no longer an active part of it. I miss seeing my brother. I miss the conversations we had and the times we spent together. My time in the fraternity was amazing and I would never change it. I am so happy that two of my brothers work in DFW. With them here with me, I know that safe space will never be too far.

I really enjoyed taking the time to put words to the things that I may not have realized I was feeling the entire time. I have certainly found myself caught up in the constant work that is being a teacher. Getting lesson plans ready, making copies, creating PowerPoints, entering grades, attending meetings, and completing the dozens of other responsibilities of a teacher can get overwhelming if you do not take the time to stop and breathe. I am glad my coach got me to sit and reflect. I will get a lot of things done this weekend. I will also stop to take care of myself and allow myself to breathe for a while.

Signing A Lease

Four day weekends are great.

This weekend was refreshing. Taking the time to put distance between myself and work was certainly welcome after a hectic first week. I am proud to have made it through the first days of summer school. There were certainly some challenges, some I was prepared for and others not so much. This week is a short one. Two teaching days and a training day on Friday. A three day week. I am excited.

Then the real work begins. For three weeks, the routine and expectations really kick in. The lesson planning cycle begins hardcore. The times I meet with my coach become more predictable. The training sessions in the afternoon after a morning in the classroom will start to feel routine. The wildest part of training is almost complete. The real challenge is waiting to begin.

The complete lesson plans given to us at the start are starting to become less and less complete. I am starting to be responsible for more and more parts of the lesson. By the end, I am supposed to responsible for an entire lesson, start to finish. No pressure though. I would be lying if I said I did not freak out every now and then thinking about all the lessons I will have to plan this upcoming school year. It is a lot. I will have to take it one week at a time, only because one day is not enough prep time.

I did make it back to Austin this weekend. Let me first apologize to all the people I did not get to see. This was a bit of an impromptu trip that was also meant to surprise my mom. The joke was on me, she was not surprised. It was great to see everyone again. I think it is a major reason why I have not felt the need to write recently. I was surrounded by familiar people this weekend far away from most thoughts of work. No BBQ this weekend so that was a little sad but there is always next time!

Shopping for an apartment was terrifying. There are so many things to be mindful of. What are the closets like? What about the bathroom? The bathtub? How much carpet is in the place? How many rooms? How big are the rooms? Washer? Dryer? Kitchen appliances? Patio? Utilities? Dining room space? Living room space? Stairs? Community pool? Community gym? Distance from work? Distance from fun? Double-paned windows??? The list goes on and on and there was no way I could get all of these answered on every tour. I did ultimately make a selection but I can assure you, it was not easy. Signing up to live somewhere for the next year of your life is a major commitment, especially if you decide you cannot stand the place one month in. The application is in though. My deposit is paid. There is no going back at this point. More details about the apartment will come later, I promise.

It's a short week. It feels completely full though. There is still so much to do even with only two days left. The countdown to the end of Institute has begun. The feelings are as mixed as they are intense. I plan on preparing myself to buckle down and focus on getting stuff done. Not because I have not already been doing that, but because there is so little time yet so much still left to learn and practice. Do not let me get lost in the rush of it all! I enjoy hearing from you. What you did over the weekend. What random thing you thought of today while eating. It is all amazing to me and I will continue to share as much as I can. It is going to be a great month, I can feel it.